Tuesday, June 06, 2006

this is me procrastinating.

Okay, so I have two Spanish finals in two days, three stories I need to critique, and handful of poets whose most recent poems await my opinion, and a half dozen revisions I need/would like to make to my own work, but what am I doing? Procrastinating, pure and simple.

I can't decide whether I always get this way when the weather turns warm, or if I am in fact suffering from some sort of "senioritis" even though I've been a senior, technically speaking, for the past few years. All I seem to want to do lately is to sit in the sunshine, work in my garden, listen to music cranked up really loud, wander around with no specific end in mind... If I had any money, I'd be planning a roadtrip. As it is, I will be spending half of June in California, but there will be no trippin' of any kind. I will be a bridesmaid in a sexy-are-we-allowed-to-wear-such-cute-dresses-in-a-church? kind of get up for my cousin's wedding. I will get to see a handful of old friends that I haven't seen in several, and in many instances ten, years. Perhaps most importantly, I will be able to hang out with my two fabulous sisters, whom I've not seen in a year.

But, I am restless. I need to find some kind of temp work immediately upon my return, or paying rent this summer will be a rather dodgy affair. I need to be sure that the graduate classes I've just enrolled in are what I want to take next fall. I need to get organized and start submitting some of my work for publication. Never hurts to get a jump on those rejection letters. If I decide to submit any fiction pieces, I'll surely have to send them to a certain charming associate editor over at Tin House, who I've recently learned thinks I am interesting and smart. (Of course, he hasn't actually read anything I've written, so we'll see how long that impression lasts...)

All in all though, life is good. My undergraduate degree will finally be complete in a matter of days. I'm sure to forget most of the Spanish I've learned over the past two years upon graduating, but that will give me an excuse to start plotting my next Latin American adventure so that I can brush up. I am already nervous about what I'll be doing and what will be expected of me in my capacity as a graduate assistant in the writing program next year, but I'm sure the nerves will subside, or at least transmute into excitement and fun. In another month or two I will have more cucumbers, crookneck, and tomatoes than I could possibly eat, and a whole summer (impoverished though I will be) to reflect upon all the many amazing things, people, and possibilites open to me and all the fine friends and memories I've made along the way. I've definitely had it worse.